Tag Archives: Family

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Relationships; Protecting & Opening Your Heart

My bestie. My ride or die. My day one. My BFF. Those are some appreciative, loving slangs that I don’t see myself using on anyone other than my sister and a future lover. Here’s the thing behind that – I am scared of trust. I am scared of wholly trusting someone who is not my sister, brother, father, mother or romantic partner (someone who has shown so much love to me to the point that I could take him in as family). This fear resulted from others’ stories of betrayal and also my personal experiences of disappointment from people that I trusted. Fear of disappointment resides within every individual. However, it should not hinder us from being the best people that we can be. We are all human and no human being is lacking of imperfection. I have failed people, and people have failed me too. My encounter with imperfection and disappointments in friendships have caused me to be patient in my relationships with amazing people. I try to reward some of my friends who I really appreciate. Trust me, I don’t use the technique of let’s share secrets with each other to keep my relationships blooming. However, I organize meet ups with them, call them non-extreme, but sweet and appreciative romantic names like Boo, Honey, Darling; I invite them to events that I will be attending. Also, thanks to technology, I check up on my good friends often. Good friendships are amazing. They boost your happiness, give you positive energy when you feel down and they empower you to keep being who you are as staying true to you has attracted some wonderful people into your life. Don’t be an Island, make friends, be good to your friends, be patient with the ones that make you happy and move away from those that make you sad and probably, make you doubt yourself. Yesterday, my sister and I had lunch with a friend, Omolade, who we had not seen in a while. We had lots of genuine bursts of laughter and it was a bonding moment. It was so admirable to see that a friendship that was built in a short period has stood the test of time, and holds a great deal of love. My sister still asks me in awe – How come she (Omolade) loves me like this? There must always be angels amidst a mixed up, confusing crowd.

My Questions For You? – Does  your fear of betrayal/disappointment restrict you in your relationships with people? – What are some things that you hope to do to build relationships with people? (Personally, I aim to start greeting my neighbours!)

Love & Peace,

Chiamaka.        

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LET’S TALK AWARDS! – University of Waterloo’s Young Alumni Award Dinner 2014

I love to write about both the sweet and bitter sides of life, as most of you would have noticed by now. So, this time around I am writing about something sweet – getting awarded! Last week Thursday, my elder and only sister – Ebele Mogo was awarded with the University of Waterloo’s Young Alumni Award. The award dinner took place at Candela (a restaurant) in Calgary. It was an amazing event. Fifteen people were in attendance, including the university’s Dean of Science, Terry McMahon, two other staff of the university, my mother, brothers, six of my sister’s friends and I. It was great to see everyone at the event speak so well of my sister. Also, each of Ebele’s friends and family members present seemed to have been inspired by her in one way or the other. My sister has been an inspiration to me for a long time. Let me tell you a little about Ebele Mogo … At age 18, Ebele graduated from the University of Waterloo in 2009. In the summer of 2012, she established a non-governmental organization called Engage Africa Foundation http://www.engageafricafoundation.org. Ebele’s passion to stop the occurrence of non-communicable diseases in Sub-Saharan Africa led her to create the Foundation. She is currently a Doctor of Public Health candidate at the Colorado School of Public Health in the United States. Here is a link to Ebele’s blog, Street-side Convos – http://streetsideconvos.com where she inspires people to be creative and also, she motivates people to become successful entrepreneurs. It came to me as no surprise that the University of Waterloo chose her to be the recipient of their Young Alumni Award for this year 2014. It was a beautiful award event. Good venue and good food. The University of Waterloo staff that put the event together did a great job. I took some pictures from the event and am very excited to share them with you all! Here you go:

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Proud mama with Ebele

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The Calgary-based volunteers of Ebele’s NGO (from the right: Jade, Nneoma and Margot)

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Tomiwa Adaramola, the treasurer of the NGO

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The Dean of Science speaking of Ebele

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My dinner. It was so delicious.

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The Dean presenting Ebele with her award

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Sharon McFarlane, who played a huge part in organizing the event

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My mum, Dr. Felicia Mogo and I

Congratulations Ebele! I do hope that this post has inspired someone. Age is in no way a barrier to greatness.

Love,

Chiamaka.

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Looking Beyond Our Imperfections and Sharing Our Truths

I was recently editing a blogpost with the help of my sister when I suddenly thought: You know, I am sometimes guilty of doing the things that I tell my blog readers not to do. For example, I was thinking, sometimes I do not forgive easily; sometimes I dwell on things that make me sad. After taking a short guilt trip, I realized something that I had to mention. I told my sister: I share my truths with others not because I am perfect, but because I know that my truths can help people including myself. My definition of “my truths” is – things that the instructor knows are factual and helpful to mankind, and some of these things, the instructor, in his/her human nature may not be perfect at adhering to. I learn from my truths. I use them often in my life, but I am not perfect at applying them at all times. Imperfection does not mean that we should hold back realities from others. I may not be 100% positive everyday but I know that living that way or close to that way, will pay off richly on the human body both physically and mentally. Thus, I will keep sharing my truth that everyone should let happiness and positivity in, and try to discard negative thoughts. Personally, there are many times when other people’s truths have healed me, and motivated me. Some people share their truths through their books, their quotes, their openness on their social networks e.t.c. Like I wrote on Twitter at the peak of my inner revelation of ‘sharing my truths’, – Share your truths with others, not because you are perfect, but because people need to know that no one is perfect and that they are not alone in their imperfections. – Your truths will uplift others. They will help people realize that imperfections are human and that improvement is a possibility. – Share your truths, and share the love that dwells within you. Be a light to others. A good point to note is that you should not share all your truths with everyone and/or just anyone. Remember that the world we live in has its fair share of disappointments and betrayals. Share those truths that you are not afraid to share, with – family, friends and acquaintances. However, for those truths that you are not very comfortable with letting out, and for truths which you only want a limited number of people to know, you should talk to a professional. For example – a psychologist, a religious leader, a counsellor. These individuals are expected to handle people’s personal matters with anonymity, so it is okay to trust them. This blog has been a medium for me to share my truths with the world, for a month now. A month today was when I established and started Blurred Creations! 😀 Through this blog, I have been able to share my passions, concerns, life experiences and ideas with the public. Get open. Share your truths to inspire, to educate, to encourage, to heal, to motivate. Happy birthday to our blog – Blurred Creations! Thank you SOOO much my dear followers and readers for being with me, Chiamaka, on this journey for the past month!:)
My questions for you?

– Why do you share your truths with others?

– What do you gain from people sharing their truths with you or the public?

Love,

Chiamaka.

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Heritage, Solidarity and You

*Please note that in this post, I am discussing heritage with regard to country of ‘origin’* “I was born there”, “I was born and raised there”, “my parents are from there” – The common answers to the question of “What’s your heritage?” Our heritage may not be the first answer that we give when asked: “Where are you from?” Someone with Polish parents who lives in Canada may refer to him/herself as being a Canadian. There is no wrong in that because if you live somewhere, you have the right to accept it as your own and you should. However, answers differ from person to person. Someone else with Polish parents could still refer to him/herself as being Polish-Canadian. My conception is that the main difference in answers points at solidarity. Most of the time when I meet people in Canada and I am asked where I am from, I mention the place where some of my family and I live in Canada, that is, Calgary as where I am from. I only mention Nigeria when I get into very deep conversations with people. Why? I try very hard to avoid the stereotypical questions that I usually get when I mention that I was born and raised in Nigeria – an African country. The most common and perhaps the most annoying one I get is: How did you learn English? (Err … basically every Nigerian IN Nigeria speaks it). Back to solidarity … Being born and raised somewhere is likely to not only give you a sense of belonging, it gives you a love for that place that cannot be compromised except in cases like war, bad leadership, betrayal or like in my case (sometimes) – stereotypes, e.t.c. I believe that “I was born there” and “my parents are from there” are similar in a way. If you were born somewhere but then moved away, there is a sense of belongingness but solidarity may not be reflex unless you go out of your way to keep up with the culture of the society which you left. When people say that their parents are from somewhere, the parents were most likely born and raised in that place. Children will probably feel a sense of belongingness to their parents’ native country but to really feel like they share in that heritage, to have some solidarity, both them and their parents have to put in work. The parents will cook their native food, make family friends with people from their native country, and/or speak their language at home. The children in turn, will feel something beyond a cultural history in the family tree but also a major sense of belongingness and solidarity to that heritage. A sense of solidarity and belongingness to a culture is powerful. It makes you feel the right to defend that heritage, criticize it and also celebrate it. When people speak untruly of Nigeria/Nigerians, I hardly fail to defend my country and my people. I criticize bad leadership in the federal government of Nigeria. I also criticize the actions of the Boko Haram militant group in Nigeria. I also celebrate my heritage, like I did on Twitter on May 18th, 2014 after I attended a Nigerian’s Graduation party in Colorado. The party reminded me so much of home – Nigeria. There was loud music, happy people and of course, lots of food – A Typical Nigerian Party. I was shy to dance for long, but the energy from my conversations with others, seeing lots of happy people and seeing people dancing like they just don’t care was beautiful. I came back home and reminisced on the event and I felt like a proud Nigerian. I captured some memories:) Please see below:

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Me working my waist on the dance floor. Could you tell that I was shy? Lol I was!

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 My sister, Ebele in action!:)

More dancing … http://youtu.be/PD9y1ed21ZM

My questions for you – Does the question of ‘heritage’ come up often in your conversations with people? If yes, how do you address that question? – Do you have a cultural heritage (religion, food, country, language, music e.t.c) that you would like to share with other readers of this blog, and myself?

Love,

Chiamaka.  

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